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By Lowell D. Streiker

ISBN-10: 1565633059

ISBN-13: 9781565633056

Lowell Streiker's Encyclopedia of Humor offers plentiful "good fresh enjoyable" everytime you want inspirational slices of existence, bracing quips, quotable knowledge, or a clean dose of nonsense to counterpoint your sermons or talks.

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Example text

I turned to Linda and said: "I have never seen a child that was so well behaved at a christening. " Betty Patrick, a member of my congregation, said to me last Sunday, "You sure did preach a powerful sermon today, Pastor. " There was a very strict order of monks, and they had a rule that said speaking is permissible only one day a year, one monk at a time. One year, a monk stood up and said quietly, "I don't like the mashed potatoes here at all. " And he sat down. A year later it was another monk's turn.

Nigel: "That's not true, Vicar. " Recently there was a dispute (quite possibly foolish) between some Benedictines and Dominicans as to which order was loved the 54 • AN ENCYCLOPEDIA OF H u m © F s most by God. After an examination of history, personal experience, and resort to prayer, no agreement could be reached. So the monks decided to send an angel messenger up to God Himself to ask the question. " Then Jesus took his Disciples up the mountain and, gathering them round him, he taught them, saying: Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven.

A few days later he told his mother, "My side hurts. " asked little Sarah when she got home from Sunday school. " "Well, he must have been," was the reply. " A Sunday School teacher read a passage from the Old Testament Book of Jonah to her class: "And the Lord appointed a great fish to swallow up Jonah; and Jonah was in the belly of the fish three days and three nights. ' . . " (Jonah 1:17-2:2, 10) When she had finished reading, the teacher said, "Now, children, you have heard the Bible story of Jonah and the whale.

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An Encyclopedia of Humor by Lowell D. Streiker

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